Is it true that the better the party, the less of it you can remember?
I groaned and sat up amidst fluffy cloud like sheets.
One eye twitched open as I looked up in confusion.
“What the fu----” I lowered my voice as I turned my head to the soft snoring next to me.
Tanned naked body passed out completely.
Oh, yeah… ..
I looked him over, smilling at his firm dimpled ass as I very quietly tried to climb out the bed.
Clothes, non. Not a stitch.
I didn’t bother looking for my underwear but I grabbed my dress off the lamp.
Curiously I looked into the trash.
I gave a big sigh of relief at the definitely used condom discardrd there.
Good, no recklessness.
I groaned as I grabbed my head.
Fuck I was never drinking again. What the hell?
I looked around for my wedges and then dropped to my hands and knees to look under the bed, finding the missing pair.
I didn’t work today but the last thing I needed was somebody from the hotel seeing me leaving Killan Hasaan's hotel room.
I treated very carefully as I grabbed my purse and tip toed to the door. I smiled and turned around.
“Goodbye Prince… “ I whispered, closing the door behind me.
**
On my way home, I tried to remember but I was drawing a blank.
Shit.
When was the last time I’d blacked out?
Drinks, lots of drinks. VIP, dancing, so much dancing… I remember Lady had came. Three? No four clubs? Dancing on table, I remember having a discussion about gays.
It was heated, but what was it about? Making out in a bathroom… fuck did I give him a blowjob in there. Wait who did I text?
I gasped and quickly pulled out my phone, and stared at the last message sent. My heart raced as I clicked to read the thread.
-Don’t do anything stupid
-I won’t do anything you wouldn’t do
-not reassuring
-didn’t know I needed to reassure you
-Joseph needs reassurance
-Well tell Joseph, I’ll be fine
I took a deep breath as I continued scrolling.
-you looked good in that dress
I swallowed hard at the three hour time gap at my next message.
-Stop being such an asshole and I’ll let you take it off me one day
My eyes bulged at my text.
-What?!
-You know you want to
-You’re drunk
I closed my eyes in despair. What had I done?
-Not drunkiihyffg jus horny
-wow
-you’re so gonna regret this tomorrow
-wanna fuc u
I gasped and covered my mouth. How could I say that?
-what?
-send the wrong text mi bad
-who was that text for?
-don worry bout it
-So why you texting me?
-wanna suc ya dick
I closed my eyes in shame. I’m going to hell. No I didn’t send him these messages. No I didn’t. Please God let me wake up from this nightmare. I scrolled. He hadn’t responded so I had texted again.
-gonna suck the prince dick instead.
What the fuck was the matter with me? I grabbed my head and groaned loudly as I looked at the front door of the house where I now stood.
This was cringy. So cringy.
Why couldn’t I just have a good night and fuck around?
Why did I have to be a drunk texter?
Fuck I couldn’t look at him again. I can’t.
Not with the atrocities I sent him.
I sighed and opened the front door. It was 9:00. I knew Joseph would be sleeping, but Marcel was an early riser. Even on the weekends.
“Please be in your room. “ I whispered, quietly closing the door behind me.
I took several cautious steps and turned my head.
He was in the kitchen as always. A cup in his hand as he flipped the page of his book.
Go quietly Lee, you are a ninja. I grimaced as I inched towards the stairs. Ninja… quiet as a ninja. Ninja skills. Make it up stairs and you’ll think up of way to save face. Remember ninja----
I hit my leg against the vase and gasped, quickly lunging forward and catching it before it fell.
It was Joseph’s grandmother.
I held it to my chest for a couple seconds.
Maybe he hadn’t heard.
My heart pounded as I slowly placed it back on the stand.
I took a deep breath and snuck a glance into the kitchen.
Bright, alert hazel eyes stared back, bringing the coffee to his mouth slowly.
Fuck.
I gave him a small smile and waved. “Hey.” I grinned, forcing the joy on me. God knows I wanted to bury myself.
I casually made my way to the kitchen as if my chest wasn’t pounding a mile a minute. “Uhh… good morning!”
Fuck that was too enthusiastic.
Marcel arched an eyebrow and put his cup of coffee down. His eyes roamed my current state of being in last night’s dress this beautiful morning.
I stood across from him at the counter.
He slowly turned the page of his book and looked back down.
It was now or never. Clear the air. Fix the situation before Joseph got up.
“So uhm… I was drunk. ‘ I stated loudly. “Very, very ridiculous drunk. Like I don’teven remember the entire night.”
Marcel lifted his head.
I nodded rapidly. “Yeah, so.. “ I scratched my earlobe and laughed nervously. “Delete it… “ I cleared my throat. “Please.” I squeaked.
I watched as he simply pulled out his phone, without saying a word. He lifted it to his face and it unlocked. I stretched my neck to see him go to his messages. He clicked on my name.
Yuck, why did he have me under Eloise Grady?
Who does government names in their phone.
I watched as all my shame came to life. I saw the messages.
Without looking at me or saying another word, he clicked delete messages and I watched every single, thing I texted last night disappear in a flash.
He laid his phone on the table and picked up his coffee.
I leaned over and just triple checked.
Gone.
All the evidence.
Gone.
I sighed and closed my eyes. “Thanks.” And took a deep breath.
He shrugged nonchalantly and returned to his book.
I looked him over. When everybody stressed around him he was really and truly unbothered.
I’d came in full panic.
I expected him to fight me on it. Tease me. Hold it over my head.
But nothing.
“Thanks.” I repeated again softly.
Marcel looked, his eyes resting on me. “You were drunk. It’s nothing.” the side of his lips curved up. “After putting up with Joseph’s drunk texts, nothing much phases me.” he smiled.
Oh, my God… .
He was…
Marcel was being… .
I chuckled softly. “He’s a drunk texter?”
“The worst one.”
I laughed holding myself.
Those hazel eyes landed on me and I then remembered why I found him to be the most beautiful being on the planet. It was something in his gaze, his aura.
I looked away shyly and shrugged. “I’m uh… . I’m gonna go take a shower and get some sleep.” I pointed behind me.
Marcel nodded, his eyes back to his book. Coffee in hand.
I turned smiling stupidly to myself as I went to the stairs.
“If you’re staying out all night, next time drop a text to Joseph or something.”
I turned around in surprise.
Marcel shrugged but didn’t look up. “He cares about shit like that. “
I nodded. “Yeah of course.” I turned back around and slowly made my way up the stairs. Feeling eyes on me, I looked back.
Sure enough Marcel was staring up at me. Our eyes met, but I quickly looked away, and rushed up the rest of the way.
Marcel looked down at his phone on the counter. His elbows rested on the cold surface as he leaned down and buried his face in his hand momentarily before running his fingers through his soft hair. He rested his jaw on the palm of his hand and looked around the kitchen. His fingers tapped rhythmically on the hard surface.
**
Marcel never brought it up.
In fact he hadn’t teased me about it or anything for the past five days.
And guess what?
I hated it.
I hated it because… .. Fucking hell, my crush for him was rising exponentially.
But it helped that he would lock himself in his studio for that majority of the time, at least out of sight. Out of mind.
Even Killan Hasaan was gone, obviously never to be seen again. We had a nice coffee chat before he left. He said he had one of the best nights of his life. I smiled unable to tell him, I could barely remember it. But it’s something about the sun and sand and the smell of the ocean that turned all memories this way.
Joseph and I hung out almost all the time when I wasn’t at work and he wasn’t with the band. Apparently they were taking a two self-proclaimed mental break from each other.
I found that healthy.
But also that meant more time with Joseph.
And more time with Joseph meant, less stupid things I did, like responding to Tyler’s text messages out of boredom.
“Nope, nope, we don’t do that here.”
“Joseph!” I cried as he snatched the phone from my hand.
He elbowed me as I tried to reach for it.
His blue eyes glared at me as he showed me my phone. “Lol, I remember. “ He pointed to the text I had just sent.
“It was a good memory.” I protested reaching for my phone.
He put his long arm out of reach as he read the text. “Lee!”
“What?” I buried my face in the pillow.
“You are fucking… . Lee you’re falling for this shit.”
“No… “ I protested lamely. I sighed. “I’m just bored.”
“Fuck, you Tyler. I hate your stinking guts.” Joseph read as he texted. “Go fuck a donkey.”
“No!” I laughed in horror. I climbed on him and we wrestled but I did mention to snatch my phone away.
He held my hip as I straddled him. My mouth dropped. “You fucking sent it!”
We both laughed as I fell back into the couch and climbed off his lap. My leg still remained there as I read the text message again. “He’s going to think I’m bipolar or some shit. “
“Good.” He smacked my thigh. “Better, than thinking you’re available. “
I stuck my tongue out at him.
Joseph hugged my legs and switched to the Netflix. “Okay your pick or my pick?”
I shrugged and stretched across him. “Your pick, but nothing scary.”
“My pick.”
We both turned our heads to Marcel who was standing literally right next to us and we hadn’t noticed. We hadn’t heard him come in.
“Something scary.” He took the remote.
“No!” I protested.
Joseph chuckled. “You know he doesn’t listen.”
And sure enough he wasn’t as he was looking through the horror movie selection.
“Fine as long as it’s not something like the human centipede, than I’m good.” I put my hands up.
Marcel grimaced. “That’s disgusting.”
“Couldn’t stomach it. “ Joseph groaned.
“Good.”
Marcel moved back to the couch. “Scoot over. “
I scooted away from Joseph all the way to the edge. Giving him the perfect spot to sit by his boyfriend.
“I want the end.” He pushed my shoulder the other way, pushing me back towards Joseph.
I obliged and straightened up. The L shaped couch was big enough nonetheless. We could all sit without touching.
But Joseph patted his lap and I happily put my legs back where they were.
It was kind of an awkward position cause, to be fully comfortable, I needed to lay my back and head against Marcel, but I pressed my back against the couch instead.
“Wait, what movie is it?” I whispered, not having seen. I was too preoccupied with the seating arrangement.
“1922.” Joseph whispered. “I heard it’s really good. “
“What’s is about?”
“Sshhhh.”
I cocked my head to Marcel in confusion. Did he just shush me? “I’m just---”
“Sshhhh.” He repeated.
This time he grabbed my shoulders s and positioned, exactly like I had dreamed. My back and head against part of his chest.
“Now shut-up and watch the movie.”
“Well damn… “ I muttered, not really upset since I was sure I was in the most comfortable of position. I smiled as I focused on the movie.
Just 10 minutes in, Marcel’s hand dropped to my hip and stayed there.
Looking at the screen, I didn’t see Joseph shift his gaze to me, then to Marcel’s hand and then to his boyfriend.
Marcel moved his gaze from the screen to Joseph. They shared a look.
“Owww.” I felt Marcel move, so I did to. He leaned in to give Joseph a sweet kiss before settling us back how we were.
I smiled.
Fucking hell could they get any cuter.
Joseph smiled as he rubbed my leg gently.
**
They went on a weekend trip.
How adorable.
But that also meant I had the entire house to myself. This gorgeous. Gorgeous place!
I’m not even going to fake that the first thing I did was follow in their footsteps.
I went about butt ass naked for quite sometime.
How liberating.
Alone time for a couple hours was great, but then I realized how much, I’d gotten used to them being around. But honestly how much I’d gotten used to Marcel’s cooking, even though he said he hated it. Between the three of us, he was practically a chef.
I’m not going to lie, I’d somehow gotten stuck with laundry.
But if he was feeding me, then hey. Couldn’t complain much.
Oh, and Joseph did groceries didn’t he.
I put in 50 a week and it seemed to work out well that way instead of how I was doing in the beginning with my separate food.
And now as I looked at the fridge, I sighed.
“I really should learn how to cook.”
But… .. . If Marcel did it, then I didn’t really need to huh?
Maybe later… later like when I’m married with my own kids… or no… maybe I’ll marry rich and hire a chef, or better yet, my husband will cook. Hey I could bring other things to the table. Like laundry.
I ended up eating out mostly with Lady.
I saw her brother again.
“Hey… hey Lee. “ He grinned. Rubbing his chest. “How are.. You… how… how are you Lee? You doing good. Lee? Huh?”
I nodded and moved away, not trying to make eye contact. “Yeah, I’m good Fortune, thanks.”
He laughed that laugh of his that made you feel bad cause you knew something weren’t all together okay upstairs but you’d didn’t want to look like an asshole by being put off by it.
He took a step forward and I took one back.
“you wanna see my toys Lee? Huh?” He grinned. “Wanna play that… that.. That… “
I looked away and smiled uncomfortably at him trying to remember his words.
“Aww shit, I forgot!” he laughed. He cleared his through, his light brown eyes shining on me. Such a handsome face behind such a slow ass mind.
God forgive me.
He grinned and rubbed the front of his jeans.
“Okay… “ I whispered and turned around, walking away. “Lady! Lady! I’m waiting for you outside!”
“Give me a minute!”
“Outside!” I yelled up at her as I rushed out the door. In tried to avert my eyes but I saw his hands were already down his pants.
“Bye Lee.” He panted. “Bye, see you tomorrow.”
I got off their porch and shook my head. I looked up at the sky. “Jesus Christ. “ I whispered.
“What the fuck Fortune! Stop that! Stop! Go the fuck to your room! Motherfucking uuuugfghhh! That’s why can’t nobody come here!”
“Sorry, Lady, I’m sorry, I forgot… “
Lady slammed her front door and rushed out shaking her head. “God, I’m sorry, he did it again.” She groaned and grabbed my hands. “Doctors say it’s like a soothing thing for him…” She sighed heavily. “Let’s go get fucking wasted. I am up to here taking care of my older brother. “
**
They came back three days later. It was in the middle of the night. Muffled noises and movements. I was watching a movie and was happy to be up to greet them.
I opened my door and rushed downstairs.
“Welcome back boys!”
Marcel had his back to me. He didn’t answer.
Joseph quickly out a big smile on his face. “Hey babes.”
“How was it?”
“Great. So good. “ Joseph answered laughing.
“Hey.” Marcel acknowledged me briefly with a head nod and left the kitchen.
I was going to joke about his rude manners but turned back to see Joseph’s eyes following him all the way upstairs.
This… energy… . Was not okay.
“Hey, everything alright.” I asked stepping into the kitchen.
“Yeah, yeah… “ Joseph answered nodding. He tried to smile as he opened the fridge. “Everything will be just fine.” He looked back. “You refilled with my favorite moscato.”
I grinned. “Welcome home darling.” I joked.
Joseph turned around and grabbed the bottle. He sighed and left the bottle on the counter, immediately coming to me.
He brought me into a tight hug.
I hugged him back, although slightly confused.
“You sure you’re okay?” I whispered.
He chuckled sadly and took a deep breath. He cupped my fac. To my surprise he leaned in and gave me a soft kiss on the lips.
I couldn’t kiss him back, I was so shocked.
“You’re great. “ he smiled. “And I honestly mean that.”
What the what what?
He turned and grabbed two glasses. “Come have a sip with me.”
I moved forward and stood across from, seeing the tension in his shoulders, sensing the forced joy on his face.
“Joseph.” I whispered. “What’s wrong?”
He shook his head. “Nothing really. I’m just… in like a state of… limbo. Not surprised. But don’t know what we do next.” He lifted his eyes to me. They were so soft and gentle.
“Is it anything, I can up with.” I offered softly.
He didn’t answer for a while as he stared at me. Then he chuckled and leaned on the counter.
“Would you like to fuck Marcel?”
Excuse me----WHAT?
My eyes widened as my mouth dropped open. “What?”
“Because he really wants to fuck you.” Joseph said, raising the glass to me and drinking his moscato.